Somehow, I allowed myself to catch a bug. It’s either the “thing that’s going around” or something different.

Normally, my diet and lifestyle are such that I don’t get thrown too far under the illness bus, but it ran back and forth over me several times before going on to plague someone else.

Bugs don’t discriminate. Young and old alike fall prey to their torments and almost everyone has an old remedy.

Thinking of my mom, I slathered Vicks all over my chest, around my throat and even the soles of my feet. My cat, who always sleeps between my feet, slept elsewhere.

To no avail. I slept off and on during the night, between coughing fits. Morning came and I moved to the living room sofa. Talking heads on television were cheering election returns in Arkansas, so I turned on what my oldest son calls “non-commitment TV.” One scandal after another. “Is you my baby daddy?”

I told the TV I didn’t care and turned the channel back to MSNBC.

It was almost “non-commitment TV,” one scandal after another.

When I’m home, I need background noise. Usually, I listen, but mostly, it’s just there.

Back in the day, mornings were filled with soap operas and my mom would have smothered me if I had coughed too hard and disrupted Grandpa Hughes’ latest piece of wisdom. I always went to watch the soaps with her when my sons were small and, later, when I found an hour for “All My Children.”

I think those days were part of why I need noise and news. It was our little part of Heaven and we bonded.

Until her last days, mom followed her soaps.

Now, our favorites are gone. I thought of mom when I dug into the kitchen cabinets and concocted a cure.

I think the old-timers called it a “toddy for the body.”

Anyway, I slept, with Ben Gay behind the ears and on the front of my neck, with a pillow over my head and a cat meowing at my ear.

Creatures who aren’t sick seldom understand those who are.

My best friend asked about every 10 minutes if he could do anything to help. Thank God he’s tolerant. “Eat –it and die” just isn’t possible.

Still, I struggled to cover a meeting and explained to the people that I had a bug.

Nice people, all.

Now, if this bug would be as nice.

Do me a favor, bug, eat –it and die. I plan to hang out for a while.