“See what you made me do!”
That phrase was my ex-husband’s motto when his behavior escalated to violence. He studied spiritual things but didn’t seem to understand his own deep rooted-issues and blamed others for his choices to hit, shove, threaten and bully me.
Domestic violence, in my opinion, is a behavior that increases children’s bullying in school. If we as adults show children violent ways at home, then they are going to mimic that behavior with others. Children are sponges when it comes to picking up behaviors. Play therapists point out that even in play, children often act out what they see and experience at home.
Perpetrators of domestic violence are also about control. Having learned force, they perpetuate the cycle of violence which begins with name calling. The survivor of domestic violence may recall feelings of humiliation, and unworthiness. Sometimes the sense that one cannot survive without the abusive breadwinner is pervasive.
But the truth is that there is help out there for someone subjected to pushing, shoving, name calling, and bullying at home. Here in the Valley we have Tu Casa, which is a non-profit dedicated to helping solve domestic violence by educating and providing safe haven for those in need.
For the complete article see the 10-16-2013 issue.
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